Five Coffee Commandments of the Office

Five Coffee Commandments of the Office

1. Gotta Have It

This may seem simple (or obvious) but an office without some bubbling brew isn’t really an office, is it? To prevent your coworkers from descending into existential madness, make sure to keep an eye on the coffee supply and take the necessary action to keep that supply up!

2. Last Drop? Top it Up


Do not be the neglectful, shameful office pariah who empties the pot and leaves it that way. Nothing is more disappointing than looking for a caffeine-kick, walking into the break room, and seeing a barren glass pot, marked only by a few specks to remind you of the dark, happy nectar that once was.

3. No Coffee Critics

Listen: Not everyone is down to have the blackest, darkest, strongest roast kick them in the face while they’re trying to work. Some people want to enjoy the flavour of coffee without being bombarded by a bean-based equivalent of a brawny bro. And there isn’t anything wrong with that. Don’t be the coworker who looks down their nose at others for adding cream, sugar, whitener or whatever else. The thing that brings us together is a love for the joe.

4. Joe-Time, then Go-Time

Some people aren’t quite what you would call a functional human until they’ve had their first cup of happiness. Don’t throw shade at the staff member who slinks around in a slump for the first few minutes at work. Odds are that once they’ve settled in and gotten that percolated power potion in their system, they’ll be beaming with delight and ready to get their hustle on.

5. Got the Shakes? Time for a Break

If you’re on your fifth cup, it’s not time for lunch yet, and the click-clack of the keyboard is coming from just resting your fingers on the keys, it might be time to give the mug a rest. Sometimes a glass of water is a welcome deviation from the perky pick-me-up. Not to mention that coffee tends to cause dehydration. Sometimes a refreshing hit of that H2O is all you need.

Plus it’s, like, one of the main ingredients in coffee!


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